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  • It’s a dawn of a new (fail)age

    Posted on May 15th, 2009 Cibo 1 comment

    With the spread of the cancer social media, people have an unprecedented to ability to annoy inform people with every minute detail of their life. I was thinking about what are the social ramifications of such conceptions. But then, LIKE LIGHTING, a news flash came. Sluts, craigslist, panties, oh my. http://abcnews.go.com/US/Story?id=7398011

    687px-Lightning_21_Feb_2007 

    dead-cows

    That’s a 52 hit dead cow combo by the way.

    Neglecting the fact I’m 2 weeks late on the story, (I got to work on that) This was an awesome news story. Dude, was getting his Web 2.0 on by using craigslist to kill hookers and collect their panties like Pokémon (I wonder which one was mud kips). He had stored his soiled loot in a hollowed out “Gray’s Anatomy” textbook, no the not the shitty show with the same name. Kind of eww since we’re talking about hookers and the rabies they carry, but I applaud the man for having a hobby.

     undies

    It’s like collecting baseball cards… coated with AIDS

     

    Taking this concept a step further, what would have the great criminals of the past been like with the interwebs?

     Columbine with twitter

    DOOMade me do it

    5             1,337  

       Following:      followers:  

     columbine-twitter

     

    Pew pew. We’re going to the gym

    …ok, we’re going to the library

    The quad.

    Wtf? Why isn’t anyone here?

    @MORE EVILZ Fucking a, our bombs didn’t go off.

    @DOOMade me do it: You know we all subscribed to your twitter dumbass.

    OMG, That’s such BS.

     

    Jack the riper with a facebook account

    Jack the awesome 

    HAI GUYS LOOK I KILLED A SLUT LOLS I’M SO AWESOME

    all me bro

    All me bro!

     

    Jack the awesome

    See, see, see, LOOK AT ME, LOOK AT MEE!! THAT’S A PIC OF ME KILLING A  SLUT. I DID IT AGAIN!!! SEE!!!! I’M SO AWESOME!!

    Jack the awesome 

    Omg, guess what, I got out of bed, put my pants on, and then killed a whore. I’m so awesome.

    Jack the awesome 

    Did I say I was awesome? Because I ate cereal with milk, which makes me more awesome.

    Jack the awesome 

    I HAVE THE FLU. IT SUCKS. I’M TOO AWEOMSE TO BE SICK  IT’S NOT AWESOME.

    Jack the awesome:

    Just to let you know guys, I’m still awesome….and I pushed a girl down a REEEALLY long flight of stairs.

     

    We can also apply this heuristic to the great events of history with social media.

     

    WW2

    America

    US-penis

    12        200,000,000

         Following:                   followers:

    @J4pan Sup, check this out.

    @America What’s up?

    @America Dude, that wasn’t cool.

     

    Cuban Missile Crisis

    Face book

    Khrushchev USSRulez Lolz Putting up Nukes in Kuba

    nitze4

    cuban nuke

     

    Comments:

      Kuban kid: cool nukez.

    Khrushchev USSRulez: I know right, aren’t they cool? Thank God no ever checks facebook for information that would be really, really bad if read by someone who wasn’t supposed to.

    JF2Kool4Skool is Putting up a blockade to stop the Russians

    blockade

    Khrushchev USSRulez is Grumpy.

    OMG how’d the US find about my nukes? Totally doesn’t make sense. I was so secretive. And dude, how did they get pics of me doing keg stands? IT’S A conspircy!

    Closing thoughts:

    I’m not going to hate on the social media too much, despite me constantly giving it shit. But let me say this, like many good ideas involving the masses, good ideas get kind of watered down to appeal to as many people as possible. The current social media dialogue usually ends up devolving into a bunch of shitty ramblings where narcissists spam messages and pics about how cool they are when everyone hates them in real life. But, maybe I’m biased….nah

    And that’s my PSA of the day.

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    One response to “It’s a dawn of a new (fail)age”

    1. i think parallel unervise is a better translation, fictional world.歷女 is girls that are extreme interested in history and historic figures. she seems to be someone who like the Zengoku era, and quotes Tokukawa Ieyasu in this episode

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